Bremen

Day Twenty Nine
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BremenBremenPawsColor

In the middle of dark night
I am careful in my step.
Gently I move around now empty space
no longer warm from your presence.

I climb stairs hoping to see
head resting on paws, bright
eyes connecting to mine,
hear the steady beat of your
tail against the floor.

I check to see if your
water bowl needs filling,
only to be met by bare wooden
floor boards discolored from years
of dripping jowls.

Our house rings of empty.
My heart still beats but
not loud enough to fill the space.

In gratitude I bow to your
being. You filled my life.

Good boy.

Almanac Questionnaire.end

Day Twenty Two
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Big Blue Bear

Sunday worship, a custom

child with hat and white gloves, black patent shoes
kneeling, hands folded, head bowed in supplication

guitars, women nearer the altar, kiss of peace

a pause, a long time gone

new words for old prayers, re-imaging Christ

no longer defined by Sunday or its tired formBigBlueBear

In reverence of Redwood architecture
joining air to earth to that which lies beneath
I stand in awe of your strength
pay homage to your constancy

Three minutes down the city banded
alleyway, a wall to halt my vagrancy,
you press me to change my viewpoint,
look up instead of down, past high rise windows
my eyes ascend to glimpse a peek of sky where
buildings join air to earth
to that which lies beneath
In observance I discover
You are also here

Outside my glazed glass frame
a tree bows in reverence under snow,
crow, owl and squirrel, bees and spiders
await their spring ritual
Tree, oh Tree, you brush my face
in morning hello
tap my window in icy storm
wear that which I cannot control,
innocent release to what Is,
you welcome me to journey
enraptured I bow to You

Lilacs, lavender, iris
purple flora scenting air
fill my lungs with song
I chant Your being

In weep of rain,
I receive your indulgence
wash away quotidian dust
rain, oh, rain
a baptism of comfort issued
Your lullaby and caress

I fear of being homeless,
without a house to cover my form.
But You are home within my being,
a house not of cards to collapse
with slightest breath
but Spirit filled dwelling
where I rest and cry, sleep and love,
You place yourself within
to walk with me in holy sanctuary
all the days of my life

Leo was there to welcome him home,
a scrap from a letter, condolences from Pam
angel doggie card in remembrance of Bremen
canidae, anubis, golden wolf,
protector of graves and cemeteries
I celebrate your unwavering devotion
Dog and God

Magdalene, a most notable person,
not whore who washed his feet,
that image only for those who boast
of saving souls, condemning sinners,
I know you as woman of understanding
the one who saw, the one who loved
the one who believed
I praise your grace

I am not the Big Blue Bear
peering into the great glass cave
hoping to be welcomed into
a walled-in temple, a postcard
perfect invitation to entice me
into a rigid model of salvation,
I choose to step aside,
turn around to join those in dance
under clear blue sky, each a unique
expression of You reveling in
your liturgy welcoming to all,
your holy sacrament to make us One

There is no conspiracy to
make me think I am Beloved,
I am
It is maitri,
through my bewilderment,
I find compassion
In disorientation, harmony,
with my befuddlement,
I am re-written, turned,
and in gratitude I accept me
I am Yours eternally

 

.

.

.

Author’s Note:

Click for how this poem came to be!

What I’ve used to create this piece:
Almanac Questionnaire
Weather: rain
Flora: lilacs, lavender, iris
Architecture: Redwoods
Customs: Sunday Worship
Mammals/reptiles/fish:
Childhood dream:
Found on the Street:
Export:
Graffiti:
Lover:
Conspiracy: not being beloved
Dress:
Hometown memory:
Notable person: Mary Magdalene
Outside your window, you find: my Tree
Today’s news headline:
Scrap from a letter: Condolence card for Bremen from Pam
Animal from a myth:
Story read to children at night:
You walk three minutes down an alley and you find: Wall
You walk to the border and hear:
What you fear: Being houseless
Picture on your city’s postcard: Big Blue Bear

Shakin’ the Blues Away

Day Eight
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Shakin’ the Blues Awayit

I look into the blue for answers

I want it to come from a place
I cannot fathom, because,
maybe something I don’t know
or see or understand will answer
and the answer will palliate the pain
I can barely hold

She murmurs the petition, Lordy,
why do we have to ask love’s failing,
love’s loss,
can’t I see
she is blue

She was wrapped in blue by unknown hands.
When was the first time her robes flowed
the color of sky weeping into a sea of fishermen
who one day would journey away

Love is delivered in innumerable shipments,
loss just as manifold

It’s part of the deal

Blue skies smile
The blues wail

It’s all perspective

.

.

.

Author’s Note:

Losing someone you love leaves a hole so deep it’s difficult to take a breath big enough to fill it in in order to stay alive.

We put our doggie down this week, a good and right decision. But the wash of blue rolls over and over me again, and again and again.

This week, this month, this year have made me wonder about words in scripture, in poetry, in lyrics, in our day-to-day musings.

I reach for an answer and come back once again to Presence. I am on a journey here – this moment, right now – making my way to fully embrace all that Is.

And sometimes it hurts. It’s part of the deal.

Lexanne

Above image: Nature’s Love Song by Ioyan Mani

Signs

Day Seven
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Signs

a crow
two ducks
a fallen rose
some would inform me signs are silly

but as a crow flies above
into a blazing sunset
a message from a loved one passed
all is well

my mom and dad
both now gone
quatered nesting ducks in their planter
two visitors in my yard today
all is well

a fallen rose
St. Theresa’s calling
she kept him company
consoled him in his fear
all is well

Spirit comes to me in signs
not every one can see them