I feel that pull again
simplify
stop gathering
breathe
restYou see I’ve worked my time
I’ve played the games
I wanted to be noticed
Seen, acknowledged
Let people know I know what I’m doing
Manipulate my life into what I think I want
Control the outcome, control everythingWhen that ends
there is peace
a quiet to hear
frogs, yes, frogs
I’ve never heard beforeWhen that other stuff ends
I reside in what has been given
Wet sidewalks after spring rain
Running brook that last week was dry
Mother Tree, always
Ravens who now come when I am present
Deer scat in the middle of suburbia
A moon so bright it wakes me up
Snow so deep with sideway winds
our aspen takes its last bow
Squirrels to taunt my BeanAnd yet I continue to gather
stuff, new now
paint brushes, canvas
ads for collage
containers, easels
stones and bells and candles
and statues and rattles and drums
and crystals and scarves and
journals and meetings
and Zoom calls
all blessings, yes
yes
yesBut..
My space gets smaller
inside and out
tighter, less room to breatheI’ve worked my time.
There is freedom calling
Freedom that asks just to sit
Not mediate
Not journal
Not journey
Not chant
Not sing
Not prayJust sit
Listen
Be gratefulI’ve worked my time
It’s time
Tag Archives: crystals
Diviation
It was a mud pie, dusty ground swirled
into water from a brass nozzle. I mixed
a thick concoction to please my eye.
Delicious would never be an
accurate description.I found the ones that sparkled
hidden among plain granite pebbles,
quartz chips, slips of mica, only those
that caught my eye were treasure
for my pocket.I peddled hard uphill, long
and slow, patient for the payback,
quick though it be, a fly down,
foot push paused, eyes squinting
against summer air across my face.Ease of childhood’s wonderment
weeps efficiently through my grasp
to leave behind hardened opinions,
germane novelties, stilled wheels.I set aside wide-eyed wonders
where magician coins awed,
grass stained knees scouted out
crawlies, tender arms rocked
a goodnight tale. I forgot
there is no need to orchestrate.I turn back, shake off the dust,
open my palms,
liberate my tunnel vision
to meet your sweetness
once again,
eternal anticipation
of my return.
.
.
.
Author’s Note:
“Truly I tell you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it.” Mark 10:15
As I grew into adulthood, I left behind something dear. The wonder of play and nature became a frivolous activity left for vacation time. But the more tragic part of growing up was assuming that I needed to control my life. I forgot the freedom of leaving my worries in the hands of someone more compassionate and wiser and loving than myself. I forgot there is Someone who knows me inside out, my needs, and what I can be.
I believe our Holy One gave us our child time to get good practice in surrender, leaving worry to itself. It was the time to trust and learn to live with abandon the gifts we’ve been given.
May I fall back into childhood simplicity,
that I may see your face, feel your embrace
and know all is well.
Amen. Amen. Amen.
Lexanne